It was a misty June day in Vermont when we pulled up to a lovely old weathered barn. The aisle was blocked off on both sides by a padded chain. The old thick wood floor was strewn with hay, and there were 4 or five loose horses walking around in the aisle, lazily cleaning up the hay. A few horses were on the outside of the barn in a paddock, hanging their heads over the chain, looking into the barn.
It was a nice scene, and although a little disorganized-looking, the feel and the horses had a good vibe. I immediately felt that this was a place of healing for horses, a low-stress place.
A cheery woman named Heather entered the barn and introduced herself as the owner of the rescue. She steered me towards a beautiful loose bay horse on the right. “This is Chewy”, she said. She explained that Chewy was a purebred Morgan from the famous Justin Morgan line. That he was now in his late teens. That he had never been easy to deal with, he was always anxious, and because of this, he had been given to her for free. That she had trouble connecting to him and trusting him. He was a sweet boy, but was always a little tense when he was out for a ride. He tripped a lot and would not really check in with her when she was riding him. She said she had known his history for most of his life, since he was a yearling, and that nothing considered bad had ever really happened to him. This perplexed her a bit, given his vigilance. She was hoping that I could help them connect better with one another.
I asked for a halter and rope so I could stand with Chewy and have a quiet conversation with him. What I call a quiet conversation is when I get myself into a state of deep relaxation and presence, and I show Chewy that I am paying attention to him. I watch for every little microexpression and shift in his nervous system, and I subtly respond to these movements so he knows I am listening. When this is done a horse will often tell you what is bothering them. They might make a face suggesting that they have pain, or they may stand with weight continuously off of one leg, or they may make a gesture that indicates what they want, or they may feel your warmth, security and concern and drop into a healing trance.
And this is what Chewy did. He went into a healing trance. You could see him processing old trauma as it came across his face. You could see him releasing old stress through yawning. He became very still and stayed in one place where before he had been needing to move, pace, and paw. I handed Heather the rope and showed her how to do what I was doing with Chewy. Chewy went even deeper into his healing trance, as a horse doing this work with a person they know well, makes them relax even more.
There was a lot of jerking and twitching as the tension that had been held in his body started to release. A few times, it looked as though he wanted to lie down. Chewy rested in one place processing for about 45 minutes before he came back to us.
I explained to Heather that I thought Chewy’s trauma was very old. That it had been with him for a very long time and that making a daily practice of the work we had done that morning would help Chewy to let go of a lot of his old baggage so that he could reset his nervous system to align with his life of peace, companionship and security at her restful farm.
My guess is that Chewy’s dysregulation occurred during his weaning. We do not often think of how traumatic and lasting this abrupt separation from their mothers can be for foals. Their only sense of security and soothing is taken away from them just at the moment of the most traumatic and scary event of their young lives. Often, foals are removed from their mother’s side to complete isolation. So many of the dysregulations, gut issues, stereotypical behaviors and hypervigilance in horses stem from abrupt weanings and inadequate social networks as they grow, learn and play.
There are many better ways to wean foals that will not risk their chance of being able to become well-regulated horses. Such as not weaning too early and weaning so that mares and foals can still touch through a fence. Making sure that foals have a friendly group of mixed-age horses to be with while they are learning to be on their own. In the wild, horses stay with their mothers and often their fathers until they are at least 2, and they also have plenty of natural time to make other friends while still at their mother’s side.
We don’t often meet our horses till long after they have been weaned from their mothers, but it is important to know that this early traumatic event has been baked into their nervous system response to things. We must allow ourselves to understand that they are dealing with things and responding to things in the best way they know how to keep themselves safe. These reactions have become autonomic responses to the insecure attachment they experienced as foals. The only way to fix this after the fact is to allow them to process old trauma and remyelinate a new nervous system response. Chewy is now on his way with Heather’s help.
